Why Cyberbullying is destroying our children’s lives

I recently received an email from Jane H via the Freedom after the Sharks website after she had read one of my blogs that I wrote on 15th May 2015: “Is cyberbullying really necessary?”

Bullying has been around for decades, even centuries. In fact, the word “Bully” originated during the 1530s. On the contrary, cyberbullying has emerged thanks to the advent of technology. In the 1990s and 2000s, webpages, cellphones, and early social networking sites like MySpace introduced cyberbullying.

Cyberbullying is any form of bullying which takes place online or through smartphones and tablets. Social networking sites, messaging apps, gaming sites and chat rooms such as Facebook, XBox Live, Instagram, YouTube, Snapchat and other chat rooms can be great fun and a positive experience. But what do you do when things go wrong?

As technology keeps evolving, cyberbullying progressively is getting worse. Different platforms and ways of degrading an individual got easier such as blogging and posting anonymously. Regrettably, this has caused some young people to deteriorate physically and emotionally or even take their own lives. All of these cyberbullying cases have prompted several groups to discuss and find an answer to this conundrum. Some of their solutions conflict with each other, but they are committed to stopping cyberbullying.

Nowadays, people associate social media with negativity, such as cyberbullying or cyberhacking. In actuality, only a small portion of youth is misusing it. Instead of using social media to hurt others, the majority are using it as a way to heal. For example, many teenagers go on YouTube to connect with their peers, find role models, and deal with their emotional and mental health.

The facts are, recently, there has been an increasing trend of “cyberbullying.” “Cyberbullying” entails the harassment of students using social media websites, text messages, emails, and other technology. “Cyberbullying” presents several new and troubling problems for state government, the school systems, parents, and the courts. Most importantly, “cyberbullying” can lead to dire consequences, such as grief-induced suicides. Sadly, this occurs frequently because “cyberbullying” is often aimed at emotionally fragile adolescents. Clearly, such tragic consequences should be prevented.

This video by Trisha Prabhu ‘Rethink before you type’ TEDxTeen conveys her emotions and passionate comments on the subject:

Bullying is a persistent problem for educators and policy leaders across education, particularly with the ubiquity and popularity of social media platforms. The problem has become so embedded in the culture that we now see the appearance of cyberbully laws in many countries against such terror.

Statistics show that Cyberbullying appears to be somewhat less frequent than face-to-face bullying, but the consequences may be even more severe, issues like trauma, depression, anxiety, academic problems and social problems can result from cyberbullying.

Schools have responded by amending anti-bullying codes to include cyberbullying in their social media policies, anyone who makes threats to a child on the internet could be committing a criminal offence. It’s against the law in the UK to use the phone system, which includes the internet, to cause alarm or distress. It could also be against the 1997 Harassment Act.

Many cyberbullies think that bullying others online is funny. Cyber bullies may not realise the consequences for themselves of cyberbullying. The things teens post online now may reflect badly on them later when they apply for college or a job. Cyber bullies can lose their cell phone or online accounts for cyber bullying. Also, cyber bullies and their parents may face legal charges for cyber bullying, and if the cyber bullying was sexual in nature or involved sexting, the results can include being registered as a sex offender.

Teens may think that if they use a fake name they won’t get caught, but there are many ways to track someone who is cyberbullying.
Despite the potential damage of cyber bullying, it is alarmingly common among adolescents and teens. According to Cyberbullying statistics from the i-SAFE foundation:

Over half of adolescents and teens have been bullied online, and about the same number have engaged in cyberbullying.
• More than 1 in 3 young people have experienced cyberthreats online;
• Over 25 percent of adolescents and teens have been bullied repeatedly through their cell phones or the Internet;
• Well over half of young people do not tell their parents when cyberbullying occurs.

Further alarming statistics show:
• Around half of teens have been the victims of cyberbullying;
• Only 1 in 10 teens tells a parent if they have been a cyberbully-victim;
• Fewer than 1 in 5 cyberbullying incidents are reported to law enforcement;
• 1 in 10 adolescents or teens have had embarrassing or damaging pictures taken of themselves without their permission, often using cell phone cameras;
• About 1 in 5 teens have posted or sent sexually suggestive or nude pictures of themselves to others;
• Girls are somewhat more likely than boys to be involved in cyberbullying.

The Cyberbullying Research Center also did a series of surveys that found these cyberbullying statistics:
• Over 80 percent of teens use a cell phone regularly, making it the most popular form of technology and a common medium for cyberbullying;
• About half of young people have experienced some form of cyberbullying, and 10 to 20 percent experience it regularly;
• Mean, hurtful comments and spreading rumours are the most common type of cyberbullying;
• Girls are at least as likely as boys to be cyberbullies or their victims;
• Boys are more likely to be threatened by cyberbullies than girls;
• Cyberbullying affects all races;
• Cyberbullying victims are more likely to have low self-esteem and to consider suicide.

There are many types of different technical tools available in the market to support you and keep your children safe online. These vary from VPNs and antivirus software to internet filters and parental controls. Essentially, none of these are really enough to help keep your child safe.

The below link is a useful guide: ‘The Ultimate Parent Guide for Protecting Your Child on the Internet’

In summary, cyberbullying is a serious issue, and like any form of bullying it can have long-term effects on its victims.

As technology continues to become an increasingly large part of our daily lives, and the lives of our children, it is important to recognize the dangers of cyberbullying and to take definite steps to prevent it.

Parents, teachers, and children must work together to prevent cyberbullying and to make the internet a safer place for all. Children should be educated on what to do and who to go to in the event that they encounter a cyberbully.

And parents should encourage schools to update their technology policies to help prevent instances of online bullying. With parents, children, and educators working together we can decrease the instances of cyberbullying and create a safer and more rewarding online environment for all of our children.

As Ellen DeGeneres once said:

‘We focus so much on our differences, and that is creating, I think, a lot of chaos and negativity and bullying in the world. And I think if everybody focused on what we all have in common – which is – we all want to be happy.’

Is Cyberbullying really necessary?

CyberBullyingCyberbullying is bullying that takes place using electronic technology. Electronic technology includes devices and equipment such as cell phones, computers, and tablets as well as communication tools including social media sites, text messages, chat, and websites.

Examples of cyberbullying include mean text messages or emails, rumours sent by email or posted on social networking sites, and embarrassing pictures, videos, websites, or fake profiles.

Cell phones and computers themselves are not to blame for cyberbullying. Social media sites can be used for positive activities, like connecting kids with friends and family, helping students with school, and for entertainment. But these tools can also be used to hurt other people. Whether done in person or through technology, the effects of bullying are similar.

Kids who are cyberbullied are more likely to:

i.          Use alcohol and drugs

ii.          Skip school

iii.          Experience in-person bullying

iv.          Be unwilling to attend school

v.          Receive poor grades

vi.          Have lower self-esteem

vii.          Have more health problems

A new film called ‘Unfriended’ which details a group of online chat room friends find themselves haunted by a mysterious, supernatural force using the account of their dead friend.

Everything happens from the perspective of a teenage girl looking at her laptop and jumping from Skype to YouTube to Facebook and so on. It’s a gimmick that works better than it has any right to, and would feel fresher if “Modern Family” hadn’t wrung a lot of comedy out of it earlier this year.

Information regarding the dead girl’s traumatic past is subtly revealed in a chat window, as someone waffles about what she wants to say, typing and retyping the words until she finds a suitably cryptic explanation. The film trailor can be found here.

The protagonists of the film, who are participating in a group video chat on Skype, are haunted around the Web by a presumed-dead girl named Laura Barnes. Laura committed suicide under mysterious circumstances exactly one year before the day “Unfriended” is set, after she was mercilessly cyberbullied over an embarrassing video posted online.

In the UK, a reported 22% of children and young people claim to have been the target of cyberbullying making this one of the most important new areas of behaviour to understand and to equip schools, care-givers, and young people with the ability to respond.

There are organisations like ‘The Cybersmile Foundation’ which is a multi award-winning anti cyberbullying non-profit organisation. Committed to tackling all forms of digital abuse and bullying online, they work to promote diversity and inclusion by building a safer, more positive digital community.

Their mission is a simple one; we believe that everyone should be able to enjoy being part of the new connected online world. Regular and productive use of the Internet has become essential to a healthy social and personal development.

Through education and the promotion of positive digital citizenship organisations like The Cybersmile Foundation can reduce incidents of cyberbullying and through other professional help support victims and their families to regain control of their lives.

Unfortunately, cyberbullying and digital abuse is increasing, holding many back from enjoying the benefits that this connected community can provide. Our current online environment lacks the balance and social rules of engagement that have been cultivated over generations, governing the behavior and relationships in the communities where we live, play and work – the physical world.

Policing, monitoring and internet restrictions can only go so far, although useful additions to any internet safety policy, they are not adequate substitutes for a thorough understanding of cyberbullying and its related issues such as netiquette and emotional intelligence.

But what if that force were just other young, stupid people? Or what if it were a smart but ordinary human hacker, exploiting security holes in always-connected software those people depend on?

Its abundantly clear that disrupting with people and their lives online can have serious psychological consequences… not just in the now but for a very long time!